Every Compass experience leaves a mark – a moment, an insight, or a story that continues to shape how we lead long after the program ends.
In this powerful reflection, Compass alumna Rhody Hill shares one of those moments. Originally published on her Substack, this story revisits The Dollhouse Exercise – a deceptively simple activity that revealed a profound truth about leadership pace and performance.
We’re grateful to Rhody Hill for allowing us to share her words here.
You can read the original article on her Substack.
Earlier in my career I was part of a hyper growth team with a high performing culture. We were young, ambitious, and relentless. Work/life balance wasn’t something we thought about. We loved what we were building and it didn’t feel like work.
To this day, many of those teammates are senior leaders scattered across some of the most exciting tech companies in the world. Looking back, I now see that environment for what it was. The entire company was full of Pacesetters. I didn’t know the term at the time, but I learned it years later in a women’s leadership program called Compass by Dattner Group.
The Dollhouse Exercise
After lunch one afternoon, we walked into a room filled with large unopened boxes. We were told we’d be split into groups and given a simple task: open the box and build the dollhouse inside.
What we didn’t know was that each group had a planted leader role-playing a particular leadership style. Some were told to be consensus-driven, some coercive, some visionary.
And in one group, a woman stood by her box calling out:
“Who wants to be on the winning team?”
Without hesitation I went straight to her. It made no sense to me that not everyone did. But of course, that was the point. The Pace Setters revealed themselves immediately. Winning was the magnet.
The timer started and we were off. We skimmed the instructions and got straight to work. Our group executed fast, drove hard, and went above and beyond. By the end we had the flashiest, most elaborate dollhouse in the room.
Spa. Mirror ball. Extra features no one else had thought of.
We were proud of it. We were also exhausted.
The Big Reveal
When the time was up, Fabian, the founder of the program, went around the room to see how each team had fared.
- One group hadn’t even opened their box. Their leader had been assigned the consensus style and they couldn’t agree on how to begin.
- Another group was visibly annoyed. Their leader had been instructed to use a coercive style, ordering people around without listening.
- A third group had built a plain, simple dollhouse. They were calm, relaxed, and quietly satisfied with their work.
Then it came time to announce the winner.
We were confident it would be us. After all, our house was the biggest, brightest, and most detailed.
Instead, the prize went to the plain, simple house.
The reason? Their visionary leader had read the instructions carefully, collaborated with the team, and noticed the last line of the brief: “Do not go above and beyond. Build exactly what is in the instructions.”
They finished first, delivered exactly what was required, and were not drained in the process. They had done what leadership is supposed to do: create clarity, deliver results, and leave the team feeling proud, not depleted.
I have sponsored women in my own teams to attend this transformational program, and every single one has come back saying it was life changing. I’ve met life-long friends through Compass including one fellow neurodivergent Pacesetter and of course, the inspiring Fabian Dattner herself. It’s not just a program, it’s a catalyst.
The Lesson
It was one of the most confronting lessons I’ve ever had.
We Pace Setters were the only group that could be identified instantly, just by the word winning. We had sprinted, pushed, and exhausted ourselves. And for what? Our drive to win meant we had missed the actual definition of success.
Pace Setting can drive results, but overused it blinds you to what really matters.
That day I understood why the Pace Setting style can be so dangerous if it’s not balanced. Speed doesn’t always equal success. Sometimes the real win is slowing down enough to understand the requirements, align the team, and execute with clarity.
What I Took Away
Since that experience, I have been more conscious of when I slip into Pace Setting mode. I still hold myself to high standards and I still expect a lot from my teams. But I have learned to adapt my style depending on what is needed. Some situations call for pace and drive. Others call for vision, collaboration, or patience.
Here are the practices I keep front of mind:
- Know your leadership style. Be aware of when it helps and when it hurts.
- Clarity over speed. Make sure everyone understands what success looks like before you start sprinting.
- Protect energy. Pride in the outcome should not come at the cost of exhaustion. Sustainable results matter more.
- Value different styles. A visionary, a consensus-builder, or a steady operator may achieve more than a Pacesetter in the right context.
- Invest in yourself and your team. Programs like Compass change careers, build networks, and create the space to uncover lessons you may not see in the rush of daily work.
- Keep learning. Leadership is not fixed. The more you adapt, the more effective you become.
Final Reflection
The dollhouse exercise was designed to make us laugh, but it gave me one of the most serious lessons of my career.
Winning isn’t about the flashiest output or the longest hours. Sometimes winning means delivering exactly what is needed, in a way that leaves your team stronger than when they started.
Fast is not always first. And if you define winning the wrong way, you may discover that winning can make you lose.
You can learn more about the Compass women in leadership programs from Dattner Group here. Our next program commences in March 2026.
